20 Signs You’re Incredibly Deprived of Sex

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man deprived of sex

The absence of sex can make any man go crazy, but for gay guys it’s a particular form of insanity. When everyone around you is getting laid, the reality that you’re not becomes depressing. So much so that everything starts revolving around the visible dry spell you’re trying to get over. But hey, we’ve been there! To prove it, here are some things you’re probably suffering through whether you care to admit it or not:

#1) Masturbation is non-negotiable when planning your day. Wake up, masturbate. Before you go to sleep, masturbate. The pesky things in the middle only take up well-needed time.

 

#2) Your fantasies are a bit overboard. The imagination gets crazy the longer you go without sex. Suddenly, you’re imagining your favorite barista giving you coffee in a jock strap; your boss laying papers on your desk dressed in a ball and gag; your roommate doing yoga in the nude – so many images with absolutely nothing tying them together. It’s like your entire world turns into a personalized YouPorn channel.

#3) You take the alternate route to work just to stare at that one billboard. You know the billboard I’m talking about. The one with the model who is totally your type – his eyes speak to you and his face looks like chiseled by a Greek God. He’s yours, he just doesn’t know it yet, so you need to visit him every day to send it out in the universe. Maybe he’ll get the message via ESP.

#4) You start watching gay porn for the story lines. You see one guy get plowed, you’ve seen them . For whatever reason, you want to know the men behind the scene. Are they, in fact, roommates in college? Are they, in fact, coworkers? Aw, that’s so sweet the pool boy has a crush on his boss. Aw, how adorable – that one runner spotted the guy running next to him and now they’re having sex.

#5) Grindr is on the home page of your Smart Phone. Psh! Who needs the extra seconds to click on your applications page and scroll down when you can hit the home option and go straight to it? Every second counts when you’re on the hunt for a steamy bathroom romance.