To The Gay Men Who Don’t Even Look My Way


gay men don't look at me

I don’t workout, I don’t wear designer clothes and I don’t wax my body hair. After hearing that you may find it hard to believe me when I say I’m a gay man.

A pleasant surprise to find out that my email to the editor of was responded to with open arms. A lot of great topics on this site, and a few that are not so good. But the thing that bothers me the most is the lack of other types of gay men in photos attached to the articles.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like to look at hot half naked guys, but I would also like to see someone that looks like me (or just someone who isn’t an Abercrombie model).

Being gay is tough enough as it is, but having to deal with the pressures of not feeling worthy because I don’t have a 6-pack makes me not have that Gay Pride that everyone always boasts about. I wish that I could go to a bar and before someone looks at me and writes me off as the out of shape guy (or bear), that they could ask me about myself and try for a minute to get to know who’s inside before just writing me off.

Although it may not look like it, I love to play outdoors. Hiking, camping and baseball are some of my favorite activities. I’m the kind of guy that if you ever had to get something off of your chest, you could come to me and I wouldn’t judge you.

I always find the good in a situation. From an early age I just learned how to enjoy the good things in life and love being able to lift other people’s spirits up. If you were sick, I would whip up a batch of my signature chicken noodle soup, bring over my box collections of Sex in the City and Queer as Folk and become your own private nurse for 24 hours.

If you’re ever feeling in a crappy mood and need to take it out on someone, I’ll be your punching bag. I’ll take it without reacting back, and patiently wait for you to calm down and then give me a kiss.

Out of anyone you’ve ever dated I would be the one to treat you the way deserve to be treated. I wouldn’t look at other guys, I wouldn’t make you feel unwanted, and I would never go a day without telling you how much I love you.

The sad part is you may never know how happy you could be with me because you won’t even acknowledge my existence. Not because I hurt your feelings or did something wrong, but because I don’t have a flat stomach or hang out with the “popular” guys.

I’m not going to let it get me down, because everything happens for a reason. There is a guy out there for me somewhere. He’s the guy who is tired of having his heart broken, the guy who wants someone to wake up with laughing, and the guy who has learned to see people through his heart and not his eyes.

Thanks for listening to the ramblings of a non-Andrew Christian model.


PS – I’m not a writer so my apologizes if any of my sentence structures made you cringe ☺



Chronically Single: A Gay Man’s Perspective

10 Reasons Every Straight Guy Needs A Gay BFF

How To Seduce A Straight Guy